Your 6 to 8 week check is for you, too
In short
- Around 6 to 8 weeks after birth you should be offered your own postnatal check with your GP. It is separate from your baby's checks and it is meant to cover how you are, in body and mind.
- It is a built-in moment to be asked how you are really doing. Many parents say “I'm fine” on autopilot and miss the chance, so it helps to go in prepared.
- You can be honest about low mood, anxiety, frightening thoughts or sleep. Your GP can signpost you to support such as NHS Talking Therapies. If you have missed the check, you can still book an appointment any time.
In the flurry of newborn appointments, it is easy to miss that one of them is for you. Around 6 to 8 weeks after birth, you should be offered your own postnatal check with your GP, separate from your baby's reviews. It is one of the few moments where someone is meant to sit down and ask how you are actually doing, and it is worth going in ready to make the most of it.
What is the 6 to 8 week check?
It is a routine appointment focused on your recovery, not the baby's. Your GP will usually check how you are healing physically, talk about things like contraception and any ongoing symptoms, and, importantly, ask about your mental health and how you are coping emotionally. It is a normal, expected part of postnatal care, and your feelings are a proper part of it, not an afterthought.
How can I make the most of it?
- Write down two or three things beforehand. It is easy to freeze and say "I'm fine" the moment you are asked, especially when you are tired and the baby is with you.
- Lead with how you actually feel, not what you think you should say. Mention your mood, anxiety, any frightening or intrusive thoughts, your sleep, and how you feel towards the baby. Concrete examples help them help you.
- Bring someone if it helps. A partner, friend or family member can say the part you cannot, and can look after the baby so you can focus.
- It is completely okay to hand over a note if saying it out loud feels impossible.
What if I've missed it, or it didn't go well?
The check is a helpful prompt, not your only chance. If it never happened, or you did not feel able to be honest at the time, you can book a GP appointment specifically to talk about how you are feeling, whenever you are ready. You can also self-refer to NHS Talking Therapies yourself, with no GP appointment needed, and expecting and new parents are prioritised.
Getting ready to talk
If it would help to put your thoughts in order before the appointment, our AI companion Nia is a private space to work out what you want to say. She is not a therapist or a crisis service, but she can help you gather the words before you speak to your GP.
If you need help now
You do not have to wait for an appointment if things feel urgent. If you or your baby are in immediate danger, call 999. For urgent mental health support, call NHS 111 and choose the mental health option, or Samaritans on 116 123, free at any time.
Not sure where to start?
Answer a few gentle questions and we'll point you to the right support for how you're feeling.
Related guides
Work out what you want to say.
Nia is a quiet, private space to gather your thoughts before your check, so “I'm fine” isn't the only thing that comes out. Not therapy, but someone to talk to first.
Talk with Nia